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May 7, 2024

Diane Calderon- Shining Light Mother Of Matthew

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In this heartfelt episode of "Grief 2 Growth," host Brian Smith sits down with Diane Calderon to discuss her poignant journey through the twin challenges of losing her son and supporting her husband through his battle with dementia. Diane shares how these experiences led her to discover mediumship and ultimately find a way to maintain a connection with her son beyond the physical. Listen as Diane opens up about her personal and spiritual growth, her new book, and how she uses her story to inspire and assist others in similar situations.

What You'll Learn:
- Diane's background in community organizing and government service.
- The profound impact of her son's passing and her husband's illness on her life.
- Insights into how Diane turned to mediumship as a source of comfort and connection.
- The role of writing and sharing her story in her healing process.
- Diane's advice for others navigating the complexities of grief and loss.

Diane Calderon’s Book:
Living & Loving Life All Day Every Day
- [Any other books, websites, or resources mentioned]

Connect with Diane Calderon:
- https://www.dianecalderon.com

Join The Conversation
 Visit https://grief2growth.circle.so/c/podcast-chat/she-is-one-bad-mama to join our discussion forum and connect with others sharing their growth journeys.

Discover a unique online space dedicated to individuals navigating the complexities of grief. Our community offers a peaceful, supportive environment free from the distractions and negativity often found on places like Facebook. Connect with others who understand your journey and find solace in shared experiences.

https://grief2growth.com/community

You can send me a text by clicking the link at the top of the show notes. Use fanmail to:

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3.) Provide feedback

Can't wait to hear from you!

I've been studying Near Death Experiences for many years now. I am 100% convinced they are real. In this short, free ebook, I not only explain why I believe NDEs are real, I share some of the universal secrets brought back by people who have had them.

https://www.grief2growth.com/ndelessons

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Transcript
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00:00:00.539 --> 00:00:26.939
Close your eyes and imagine what are the things in life that causes the greatest pain, the things that bring us grief, or challenges, challenges designed to help us grow to ultimately become what we were always meant to be. We feel like we've been buried. But what if, like a seed we've been planted, and having been planted would grow to become a mighty tree.

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Now, open your eyes, open your eyes to this way of viewing life. Come with me as we explore your true, infinite, eternal nature. This is grief to growth.

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And I am your host, Brian Smith.

00:00:45.749 --> 00:01:47.009
Guess I've known Diane for about six years now. And she always has impressed me and the more I get to know Diane, the more she impresses me and sitting down at this interview with her and learning about how she dealt with the passing of her son. At the same time she was dealing with her husband passing away from dementia. And what she has done with that is just so inspirational. So make sure you stay tuned for the whole interview because this is incredible. Hey everybody, this is Brian back with another episode of grief to growth, where we explore the intertwining paths of grief, love and the everlasting bond that transcends the physical realm. And today I'm really excited to have with me, a friend of mine, a federal shining light parent, someone who has a child to spirit. Her name is Diane Calderon Diane story is a testament to the human spirits capacity for transformation and for healing.

00:01:42.989 --> 00:02:37.979
After decades of dedicated service and various levels of government from local and federal, our life took a series of profound turns. Our roles have been as diverse as a community organizer, a training coordinator of research and statistician, a postal worker or even the Union officer that showcases our commitment to service and community and community as you'd say. She also served as a deputy director for the Governor's Office of affirmative action under Arizona's first female governor rose Malford, making marking a significant milestone to Diane's career. But after retirement, Diane's life took an unpredictable turn like all of us do, down pat she never anticipated. After she retired, she found herself as the full time caregiver for her husband with his during his struggle with Lewy body dementia. That's a child to tested her strength and resilience in ways of course, she couldn't foreseen.

00:02:38.459 --> 00:03:15.628
But even during that Diane experienced the tragic death of her son Matthew, the marked another pivotal moment in her life, and led her to where she is today. She is a customer service manager for a famous medium that Diane both both both those Suzanne Wilson. She's a new author, she's got a great book out, we're going to talk about her book today, we're going to talk about all the things that that Diane has been through and the resilience that she's shown through that. And I hope that it's going to bring hope to everyone listening for regardless of whatever it is you've had to go through or going through now. So with that, I want to welcome to grief to growth, Diane Calderon.

00:03:18.538 --> 00:04:02.399
Thank you very much, Brian, I very deeply appreciate the opportunity to meet with you and talk a bit about my book and to share some of the things that both of us have gone through and many of your listeners have experienced the loss of a child. And I know from the bottom of my heart, how challenging that can be that experience. And it's great that people like you and I have found an opportunity to meet with others who are going through a similar process to support each other, and bring us to a better place. So thank you very, very much, Brian, and I know your podcast touches a lot of hearts.

00:04:02.429 --> 00:04:02.968
Thank you.

00:04:03.180 --> 00:04:39.660
Well, I said I'm excited to have you here. I do want to let everybody know right now Diane, and I were internet connection. There's a little bit of delay. So we're going to try to work through that. So there may be some pauses between our our questions and responses. But what I like to start with Diane is whenever I talk to a parent who has a child and spirit and you and I are very careful language I don't say lost children because I don't think they're lost. But when I talked with a parent that has a child and spirit, I want to ask about Matthew, tell me about Matthew, who he was as a little boy who he was as a man he was here and who he is now.

00:04:41.699 --> 00:05:20.129
Okay to talk about Matthew this kid was not anticipated birth I ended up having this guy named Matthew because I saw him as so unexpected that he was a gift and when I researched name's Matthew met gift from God, and I thought that was a perfect name to give him. It was the sweetest little kid. My mom would call him her little angel, which, you know, over time, we thought that was really kind of funny because he wasn't that much of an angel.

00:05:14.699 --> 00:06:14.910
But he was a pretty good kid. He always had friends, he loved sports, he loved doing things with his friends. He was not the greatest sports person. Often he sat on a bench on the teams. But he got really involved in supporting a team. He played basketball, baseball, Little League, everything that you could possibly think of as he was growing up. In school. He was a good student, not the greatest but a good student hated reading, which surprised us because my husband and I were big readers, we just loved reading. Matthew, though, would just absorb knowledge by doing he was that kind of an interactional person. As he got older. We had bought property up in northern Arizona. As a young kid, we were in the Phoenix area, but we bought property in northern Arizona with the idea of eventually moving up there.

00:06:15.329 --> 00:06:45.629
And we began to build a home from the ground up, come up on weekends to build so Matthew was 13 when we started. By the time we moved here, he was in high school, and he began to learn how to build by just watching sounds from plumbing, electricity, framing, everything Matthew absorbed it. In school, high school, he took construction classes. When he went into community college, he was in construction management.

00:06:45.930 --> 00:06:54.660
He had big ideas about being a general contractor building homes for poor people.

00:06:50.759 --> 00:07:06.209
Basically, he had plans he had drawn up to buy property and we would invest and build homes for low income people. None of that came to fruition because he would get distracted with life.

00:07:01.829 --> 00:07:14.069
Matthew did design and build a home for us on a piece of property we had and we sold it to make a few bucks, beautiful home, it's still sitting there.

00:07:14.069 --> 00:07:32.819
It's gorgeous. But in the next 1015 years of his life, he had scattered energies. He worked at a gold mine in Nevada. He was a river rafter in Colorado, he was a project supervisor for a huge construction project in Indiana.

00:07:28.709 --> 00:08:28.589
He worked on a lot of different programs in Phoenix and in the Prescott area, renovating homes and doing maintenance and things like that. It was always his dream. He just couldn't settle into anything. When he was about 35 years old, he began to get serious with life decided it was time to pull himself together and work towards his contractor's license. At that time, I was dealing with my husband Sal, who was showing the earliest signs of Lewy body dementia, those progressed pretty quickly into the medium stage where he needed quite a bit of care. Matthew had offered to bring me into his little business enterprise, he would take the contractor's license if I would do the business aspect, since I had some time on my hands. And I had a little bit of background on, you know, computers and business and accounting and things like that.

00:08:24.540 --> 00:08:59.159
So the plan was Matthew would get moving on his business, and I would have something to help keep me busy in between taking care of sound. At the height of this Matthew called me one day and said, Hey, I'm going to be up tomorrow, I'm going to help you out. But I'm going to a program tonight. And it's about contracting. So I'll see you tomorrow. So the next day, Matthew kinda left this place and left me hanging for a bit.

00:08:54.960 --> 00:09:07.620
But to sum it up, Matthew was a good person. He had a lot of friends. He was most social animal I ever knew. And I just missed him terribly. So.

00:09:09.120 --> 00:09:13.740
What can I say?

00:09:09.120 --> 00:09:20.610
Yeah, I know that his passing was was sudden and unexpected.

00:09:13.740 --> 00:09:33.389
So but there was I'm trying to figure out what order we want to tell this in because even before he passed it Sal had the Lewy body dementia and you haven't experienced before Matthew passed that. I don't think you thought at the time for shadow dip. It seems like it might have

00:09:35.580 --> 00:09:39.509
right about a month before Matthew had passed.

00:09:39.539 --> 00:09:44.429
Sal had a neurology appointment down in the Phoenix area.

00:09:44.460 --> 00:10:07.320
Matthew was living down in Phoenix renovating a home we had bought and working on a construction project. He had a day off same day I had to take Sal down for the neurology appointment. So when we exited the doctor's office As Matt was out in the parking lot and said, Hey, I surprised you, ha. Let's go for lunch. So we went to lunch had a very nice time.

00:10:07.679 --> 00:10:15.120
Matthew asked if we would stop by the house where he was staying to pick up a few things.

00:10:10.379 --> 00:10:41.100
So it was on our way home. On the way over to the house, we go down Camelback Road, if you're familiar with Phoenix, we turn north on 23rd Avenue. It's a small residential feeder Street in the Phoenix area not that busy. We're driving up 23rd Matthew's house is just off 23rd Avenue. Before we got to, you know, a few blocks away from the house, Sal starts freaking out.

00:10:36.269 --> 00:11:22.440
Now, this was not unusual for him because of Lewy body dementia, he would sometimes go into periods of paranoia and hallucinating, I'd had experiences before where I'm driving, and he's afraid I'm kidnapping him and he tried to escape from the car. But on this day, he seemed fine. Until we drove up that street and got closer to that house. He started freaking out on me and was moving his foot as if to hit the brake and saying Stop, stop, stop, stop. I stopped I then pulled over said What's wrong, he's gonna get hit, he's gonna get hit, somebody's gonna get killed. I don't know where that came from. Because there's nobody in the street. There's hardly any traffic whatsoever.

00:11:22.440 --> 00:11:52.259
It is a residential area. So I was insistent not to continue on that road. So I flipped the car around, did not go to Matthew's house, hit the freeway and brought South home. weeks later when I'm reviewing what had happened that day, it just surprised me because that street that we were driving on that location where South started freaking out. And I pulled over was like two blocks away from where Matthew actually crossed.

00:11:52.889 --> 00:12:09.840
And he got hit by a car. So was that a premonition somehow sounds mind was out there in a future point. I'm sure of it. He foresaw something. He just wasn't real clear in his head as to what that something was.

00:12:06.990 --> 00:12:13.559
There were no details. He just knew something bad was going to happen in that location. That

00:12:13.559 --> 00:12:31.110
I when I read that in your book, and I've known you for for years, but I didn't know that story. I was just like, that just blew me away. So Matthew, you mentioned he'd come to see you before we pass. And so tell me about how you discovered that he had been struck by the car?

00:12:32.549 --> 00:13:00.029
Well, kind of a long story short, Matthew had been up for a few days, the week before he passed over. And he was very engaged in helping me with Salah was at a point where I couldn't take Sal anywhere with me if I took him to a grocery store or anywhere he could get into a point of fear, didn't know where he was. And that was kind of challenging to get him through the store back into the car and get him home.

00:13:00.299 --> 00:13:07.019
So Matthew would come up when he had time so I could run and do errands and get groceries.

00:13:03.690 --> 00:13:29.669
Matthew was also working on this contractor's license and needed to collect paperwork in the county and in the Prescott area to submit for the license. We had a long discussion one day the last day Matthew was here about a lot of things and one of it was about life and death and spiritual matters things that Matthew and I had never really discussed before. But on that day, we did. Matthew then left.

00:13:29.820 --> 00:14:03.899
He went down to Phoenix. He was at a hiking club. He had some work to do. He called me up on what was that Tuesday morning, told me he'd be up later that he had a conference he wanted to go to that night. So what happened next is the next morning I get a call from a detective in Phoenix telling me you know, I asking are you the aware of a Matthew Helmick and I said yes. And the detective said, or How are you related? I said I'm his mother.

00:14:04.409 --> 00:15:28.500
And he said Matthew died last night he was killed in a hit and run accident when he said that I almost lost it. But I had to keep it together because ah you know it's that news one might get and you you've got to know some details. You've got to know what's going on. How is this possible? This can't be real. Am I imagining it? kept my composure heard more from the detective asked some questions I needed to know you know, where did this happen? What time was his dog with him because Matthew would take the dog to the dog park Matthew's house was a block away from a park. He was crossing 23rd Avenue the street that Sal had freaked out on with the dog. Fortunately, the dog was ahead of him and not on a leash because she was a really good dog and he didn't follow rules and put her on a leash like you're supposed to at the park. So she did not get impacted but he as he was crossing a car had hit him and kept going, I hit and run. The detective said Matthew had died pretty much instantaneously from what they can tell. And the detective told me the time of death. So there I was on the phone, trying to figure out you know why that happened? What to do, I couldn't believe my ears.

00:15:24.120 --> 00:15:50.039
I get off the phone. I go to sow, who then was not all there that morning. And I said to him, Matthew died Matthew died the police call and said he got hit by a car and the best style could do was tapped me on the head and say, I'm sorry. That was kind of it was Sal that morning. So that's kind of bringing you up to that point of finding out about Matthew.

00:15:51.269 --> 00:16:02.759
And I, I'm so sorry, I don't even know what to say, you know, dealing with with your your husband would lead to Body Body dementia, I'm sure.

00:15:59.580 --> 00:16:06.389
And I've gotten through dementia with my in laws. So I'd have some idea of what that's like.

00:16:06.389 --> 00:16:14.250
And, you know, being his caregiver and then having Matthew pass, I can only imagine that must have been devastating.

00:16:15.539 --> 00:16:20.009
What were your thoughts at the time? You know, when you got that call?

00:16:21.779 --> 00:16:47.519
Well, to tell you the truth, when I first saw the caller ID that it was Phoenix. My first feeling was, oh, that must be Matthew calling because sometimes he would lose his cell phone. And he would borrow one from somebody to call me. And I knew that he was due up that that picking something up that day. So I thought well, I guess Matthew lost his phone.

00:16:47.549 --> 00:17:24.180
And when I said hello, and I hear a male voice and the male voice says hello, this is Detective so and so. My heart sunk. Matthew had had some brushes with the law in his life, but never had a call come to me from a police officer. If Matthew had been picked up for something. It would be him calling say, Hey, can you pick me up at the jail, I got pulled over for something. Never had a call come in from a police officer. So once I heard, you know, I have a detective calling me I just knew something bad had happened. Something was wrong.

00:17:24.240 --> 00:17:29.970
This was off the detective, you know, work through the details.

00:17:29.970 --> 00:19:00.660
And I did ask for details. I spent maybe 15 minutes on that phone call, grab paper. I'm writing things down and got the detectives information. And I asked you know where this happened? Did Matthew die quickly? Or was there a period of time and the detective was pretty sure it was quick. He said that the young man who had hit Matthew that wasn't hit and run he kept going. But he called and turned himself in an hour later. Apparently he had his mother's car. And the mother had convinced him you need to turn yourself in. young kid about 20 years old. He doesn't remember anything. He doesn't know how that happened. So that was pretty devastating to hear that news. I get off the phone. I did sit for just a few minutes to kind of get myself together. I'm crying a little bit but I knew that I couldn't break down I had Sal in the wheelchair, dining table and he he had been known to sometimes push himself back and have that wheelchair fall over. I couldn't just ignore Sal. I had to go in and talk to him. And then after I told him what had happened, I was able to move him into his recliner where he wouldn't be safe. Then I broke down. And it took a while to compose myself. Had to make phone calls. So you know you call I had to call the his Matthews girlfriend because the detective said that Matthews dog Abby was at his house and was on the front porch and was scared.

00:18:57.150 --> 00:19:04.740
So somebody needed go over and get Abby and take care of her.

00:19:00.660 --> 00:20:32.309
And of course you know who else would you call but the girlfriend, let her know what had happened. And you know, she just fell apart but had enough composure to run and get the dog and later in the day she was able to meet me halfway from Phoenix to give me the dog. I had to call relatives I called my sisters first and both of them dropped everything they were doing and found ways to get to me that day. I asked them to call my dad because my dad was beginning to get into his senior moments and I wasn't in an emotional state to be able to talk to my dad. She so one of my sisters called and told him and they called some of the other relatives I called a couple of very close friends of mine, one who lived nearby and she dropped everything and came over and spent the rest of the day helping me. I call my stepson who lived about 40 minutes away, he came over to help and I called my dearest friend who lives down in Casa Grande, Arizona. Sal and I had married at her house, we had been close families forever. And I talked to her because she had lost her daughter a few years before to another tragedy. And I knew that she would give me the advice I might need in the shoulder to cry on and that she would understand. She and Matthew were always very close. And I called her and she helped me through those first few days, she knew who to talk to and what to do to get things arranged. So it was a hard afternoon, Brian, a very hard afternoon. Oh,

00:20:32.309 --> 00:20:54.420
absolutely. I you know, it's just It amazes me the resilience, the power of the human spirit to keep moving forward. Because I know people listen, this was saying, I could not do this. I couldn't make it through this. How did she How did she keep her composure? How did you? How do you do the things that you know you need to do?

00:20:57.539 --> 00:22:03.150
You know, you know, I know, it's, it's not easy. making your way through that instantaneous deconstruction of your life. And I am very fortunate that at that moment, I did have some support from my friends and from the family. I think I also had a little bit of a spiritual support inside of me an inner strength that was able to come forward and help me carry through those next few hours. I just believe that Matthew would probably be okay. I didn't have any evidence at that time yet that he was, but I wanted to believe he was okay. But I also knew that I had to carry forward I, I had a husband to take care of I had a home I had, you know, later that day, I had Matthews dog to take care of she was just terrified. And I had responsibilities. I couldn't just set all of that aside and feel sorry for myself. It was something like that thrown at me. And I needed to deal with it. And I needed to deal with it immediately.

00:22:03.329 --> 00:22:16.289
Yeah. But you did have you said you felt like you had spiritual help. And I can tell from from your book that you did, there were a couple of things like almost miracles that went around around this around Matthews passing.

00:22:18.180 --> 00:22:22.140
Yeah, this is where it got really interesting.

00:22:23.460 --> 00:22:41.009
Matthew and I in that discussion I mentioned earlier, where we got into some spiritual topics we mentioned, you know, how wise told them how much I loved him, I loved him more than anything in the world, him and Sal, they were the dearest things to me.

00:22:41.940 --> 00:23:38.940
And I told him that I had had this belief for a long time that we as little souls before we're born, have a little bit of a say in the lives that we are going to enter we have some kind of a planning that we get involved with, and that we have a say in who our parents are. And I told them, I'm pretty sure you chose me as your mom and Sal is your dad. And I know sometimes that hasn't worked out well between us. But hey, you chose me, you can only blame yourself, Mr. And we laughed about it. And I said, I don't know where I got that idea from i It's been in my head for a very long time. But I do think we have some say in who our parents are. And we got into some other philosophical spiritual ideas. And at the end, I don't know why I said this, but popped into my head. You know, Matt, someday, one of us is going to die before the other probably me because I'm older.

00:23:38.940 --> 00:23:48.720
And you know, usually the older ones going to die before the kid. But let's make a promise right now, whoever dies first has to come back and give a sign to the person that's still here.

00:23:49.380 --> 00:23:54.299
And he kind of looked at me and like, Well, yeah, okay. Sure.

00:23:54.539 --> 00:25:08.819
Let's do that. So here I am sitting on this. Wednesdays when I had gotten the word that he had died the night before. And I'm sitting there waiting for my sisters to show up. I'd had a long day. I was able to get Sally to go to bed early that night. And he was rather, you know, sedate for a change sitting at the table. And I'm thinking about, you know what had happened that day? And how heartbreaking it was, and how am I going to make it through the next few days. I just don't know, how am I going to make it through my life. We had plans and those all went out the window. I didn't know what I was going to do. As I'm sitting there, I began to review that last discussion I'd had with Matt it only been like four or five days before. And I was thinking you know, Matt, we had this talk about how you and I made you know an agreement that if one passes the other one has to let the person remaining. No, I didn't get assigned. Dammit Matt. Where's my sign and as I'm thinking that it hit me bang Wow, wait, I did get us line, holy cow, did I ever get a fine.

00:25:00.900 --> 00:25:12.990
And here's the sign I got this, this changed everything for me.

00:25:08.819 --> 00:25:17.819
I'm telling you. The night before, it was a Tuesday night.

00:25:12.990 --> 00:26:13.980
Sal and I were sitting on the sofa, a program was going to start, in fact, it was the State of the Union by the President, we would watch the State of the Unions almost every year, we were just sort of political junkies. And we loved Obama. So we're sitting there waiting for the State of the Union. And Sal had been pretty quiet that afternoon. And he's focused on the television, and, you know, they're getting ready for the proceedings. And I'm kind of fidgeting because I don't know I have to multitask. I guess if they're not talking on the TV, you know about something I'm interested in, I'm doing something else. So I'm kind of fiddling around, and all of a sudden, I saw in front of me, little lights sparkling. I mean, they were like sparklers, that you light up on the Fourth of July. They're the sparkling right in front of my face. And I look at it, I'm like, oh my god, what is that? They were there two, three seconds. I'm not sure I didn't count. I just saw them.

00:26:09.539 --> 00:26:17.460
And they disappeared. Either thinking, Okay, that was really weird. What the heck was that?

00:26:17.759 --> 00:26:24.809
looked off toward sow. And they're sparkling in front of him. About the same distance away about an arm's length away.

00:26:25.049 --> 00:26:45.390
But he's looking straight at the TV. He doesn't seem to see the lights. He's not responding to anything. He's just watching this TV screen. I'm looking at them, they disappear. I look ahead again. And I think okay, I must be losing it. That's not going to be good. If sales hallucinating and I start hallucinating. Who's going to take care of things. Oh, my God.

00:26:45.420 --> 00:27:01.650
And then they showed up again, same thing sparkling in front of my face. All different colors, just sparkle sparkle. They hung out there for a little bit longer. But this time they moved to my left. I followed them.

00:26:56.789 --> 00:27:08.700
They went about a 90 degree angle. And then they disappeared. And I'm looking over that way. And I'm like, Oh my God, I am. I'm going crazy.

00:27:08.700 --> 00:28:09.569
I'm losing it. I'm looking over there. As I look over there. I notice on the table next to me is a book. Now like a dog sees a squirrel. I do the same like book. I pick up the book. It was important because it was a book about Edgar Cayce. He called There is a river. And I knew that when I saw that book, that's where I got my idea about children choosing their parents now am I knew, I don't know how long that book had been sitting on the table. South tended to wander around the house, pick things up and drop them. It had probably been there earlier in the day could have been there three days, I don't know. But here it is. He had pulled it off the shelf and art library and had dropped it there. So here's this book, I knew that this is where I had my idea from I open that book, right to the page, where they're talking about children choosing their parents, I couldn't believe it. It's like, oh, my, this is the page.

00:28:09.690 --> 00:28:21.990
Well, Matthews coming up tomorrow, I'm going to show him this book, I'm going to show him this is where I got my idea from. So now my head's you know, focused on the books. I'm ignoring the State of the Union.

00:28:19.170 --> 00:28:33.930
I mean, the Union could be great or not, I don't care. I'm reading this book. So I'm printing the whole chapter. You know, like refreshing my memory like yes, yes, yes. This is where I got my idea. And I close it and I set it down and I'm watching the program on TV.

00:28:34.109 --> 00:28:39.089
didn't think much more about it.

00:28:34.109 --> 00:28:59.339
So 24 hours later, I am sitting at that dining table and I'm saying dammit, Matthew, where's my sign? And that all floods right back into me. Whoa, wait, those lights last night, the lights I forgot about because I got distracted by the book. I didn't think anything more about those lights. Until I remember.

00:28:54.059 --> 00:29:17.549
I had those lights in front of me. I knew at that moment. That was Matthew, that was his energy showing up in our house and saying hello to me and saying hello to sow and then draw my attention to that book. I had no doubts. There was nothing that could distract me from that.

00:29:17.579 --> 00:29:35.009
That was Matthew. And I'm telling you, Brian, that changed everything for me. He brought me that side. He said, Yeah, Mom, you're right. We continue living. There's a great afterlife, and hey, look at that book. That's where you got the idea. You're right, man, you're right.

00:29:35.759 --> 00:30:02.849
That I've just covered and goosebumps right now. That's just that that's so amazing. And I think it is such a great example of how the universe supports us, even when we're unaware, you know, and sometimes we don't figure it out till later on. We look back on it. And realize, you know what had happened in the moment but the conversation you had with Matthew which it sounds like you didn't have these conversations often right? It just gets him out of the blue and you're saying things you don't know why you're saying them?

00:30:07.019 --> 00:30:12.720
Yeah, yeah, I have no idea why that conversation came up that day.

00:30:08.970 --> 00:30:45.869
It just did. I mean, you know, over his adult life once in a while you talk a little bit of philosophy, but he was not a deep thinker. He wasn't much, you know, for reading. I discovered later as we were cleaning out his house and going through his things that he had actually, in recent months before he passed, taken an interest in a few spiritual things. He had some books by a current toll that he had been reading he had been listening to audiobooks by, what's his name?

00:30:40.619 --> 00:31:30.000
Don? Miguel Ruiz, I think is his name, the guy who does the Four Agreements. Yeah. Yeah, in fact, one of those audio discs was in his truck when I picked up the truck at the house, and it was playing. And it kind of shocked me, it's like I recognized it right away, I noticed the track that he was listening to. And later, when I was able to get my hands on the book, I read the section. And it was really remarkable that the last things Matthew would have been listening to in that truck, you know, moments before he died, because he had driven home that night, and then took the dog for the walk was these four agreements. But in the book, it's talking about being a warrior soul, and then going and having a resurrection. Yeah, it was just, it just blew my mind.

00:31:30.000 --> 00:31:50.069
So Matthew had been having some interest in spiritual matters towards the end. And I found out through his friends that he often talked about, well, I'm not going to be here long. And you know, I'm just going to be here for a short time. Nothing's he would ever say to me, I don't think he wanted to get me going and get me upset or something.

00:31:47.220 --> 00:31:55.349
But there was something in his being that knew he wouldn't be here forever. Well, he just seeking answers. Just

00:31:55.349 --> 00:32:38.670
a really small aside, you mentioned Don Miguel Ruiz. I was listening to a podcast this morning. And it was an interview with his son. So yeah, that was pretty wild. So So you, you have this experience. And you kind of have this knowing that Matthew is still with you. And I don't want to take it. I want people to get your book, because there's a lot of great stuff in the book, a lot of great sides in the book, but you, you start to get these signs that Matthew was showing to you and other people around you, et cetera. But you're dealing still with you know, with Sal with what's his dementia. So how did your life progress after Matthews passing?

00:32:40.829 --> 00:33:20.339
Well, after his passing, I had two years of dealing with cells growing decline into dementia. And they were very challenging years. And they took a lot of my energy. I was homebound for a good part of that I ended up having to pay somebody to come one afternoon a week to watch South so that I could go and get groceries because I didn't really have a family nearby that could take care of them for me. And I didn't want to put the burden on friends like come over every week and watch sow, I paid for somebody to come I got them on hospice at some point. And there was a lot of care through them.

00:33:20.819 --> 00:34:04.680
And I could no longer, you know, get him bathed, or or do some of the things that needed to be done. So I had some support. I also had a little bit of time on my hands shortly after Matthew had died. And I was putting together the, you know, announcements for the paper. I had someone at one of the local newspapers tell me, you know, this is a great announcement. I don't usually get things like this. I think you might be interested in reading books by a couple of people. One's a medium. They're both from the Phoenix area. One book is by Allison DuBois. And another one by Mark Ireland look it up. I'd never heard Mark Ireland or Allison Dubois didn't know anything about mediumship.

00:34:02.069 --> 00:34:15.750
Really, I mean, I knew there was a, you know, programs about mediums or that movie Ghost where Whoopi Goldberg plays a medium but I really hadn't pursued anything on mediumship.

00:34:11.849 --> 00:34:15.750
So I got a hold of those books.

00:34:15.750 --> 00:34:55.079
I had some time on my hands to sit and read when Sal was snapping or you know, asleep or something. Found out that mediums can connect with people on the other side. Wow, that's really fascinating. Mark Ireland's book really touched my soul because he had lost his son to an unexpected death. Lived in the Phoenix area Scottsdale, I believe. And he his book went through a lot of tales in which he describes trying to find out about his son to connect through mediums. Mark's dad was the famous psychic Richard Ireland.

00:34:50.670 --> 00:35:48.599
Oh, I recall my mom was interested in when I was young, she would watch programs and I remember seeing Richard Ireland being interview Dude, I don't know why that name stood out. So here's Mark Ireland with his tail and I followed it faithfully. I learned about helping parents heal through Mark's books, got my hands on other books by other mediums about mediums. I watched the Long Island Medium to see how she operates. I learned a lot later in 2015, so about Matt died in 2014. So a year and a half after he died. I had an opportunity one afternoon to have someone take care of Sal for the day and I went down to Phoenix to helping parents heal meeting. And the medium there was I believe it was Jamie Clark. I listened to Jamie in that session, and I'm sitting there like all the other parents, I Oh, please connect with my son connect with my son.

00:35:48.599 --> 00:36:42.659
And Jamie had a couple of little things that I almost said that might be me, but someone else took it. I thought that was amazing to watch Jamie and I could see how he was helping so many others. So I became a pretty strong believer in mediumship. Prior to that, though, just to say, in 2014, in the months after Matthew had died. I was so intrigued by the medium ship. I thought I'm going to have to have a reading. I just have to have a reading. I have to know one thing. Why did Matthew put himself in danger that night? Why was he even in the street if there was a car coming up that road? Why was he in the street? Like I said it's not a busy road? It was nighttime when he got hit? He should have seen the car's headlights. I had asked the detective. Did the guy have his headlights on? And he said yeah, yeah, they were on they were on.

00:36:43.230 --> 00:36:52.380
So I couldn't figure out why Matt would have been in that row. So I had a medium reading.

00:36:45.300 --> 00:38:33.570
I chose to have the reading I believe it was at the end of May. Matthew died at the end of January. I felt by then I was comfortable enough with mediumship that it was worth a try, though I was still a little skeptical. When I tried to find a medium. I went to Best psychic directory because I had stumbled into some works by Bob Olsen and I felt that he had done some research and trusted that his list of mediums would probably be a good one to pull from. The very first medium I pulled up was one in Arizona I thought oh I got one in Arizona didn't realize mediums can meet you on on over the phone or on Zoom or some other means thinking I'd have to have an in person. The first one who I pulled up was Suzanne Wilson, the carefree medium. And I'm looking at her page. It's like Wow, she looks really nice. And that's in carefree. I guess I could probably arrange to go down there. But then I got hesitant and skeptical. I don't know enough about mediums. The news about Matthew's death was in the papers. It was on television, I could go back and see the videos of the crime scene, so to speak, because it was available on the internet later on. So I was skeptical. Now I don't know she's too local. She could look it up, right? I'll find somebody on the other side of the country. So I did pick the person named Cheryl Cheryl was a retired nurse. She had done geriatrics, I thought, well, this is good. Maybe she could connect with Matt. And if nothing else, maybe she could give some insight on Sal and his condition. So I arranged for a medium reading with Cheryl. All she had was my name, Diane.

00:38:33.780 --> 00:38:41.190
That's it. Didn't ask any questions. We opened up that meeting. It was towards the end of May. And it was remarkable.

00:38:41.489 --> 00:38:45.179
What Cheryl brought in. It was just remarkable. It was healing.

00:38:45.480 --> 00:39:18.809
It answered questions. And I didn't really have a lot of questions that I was allowed to ask. I had a list. But Cheryl had said, Okay, let's just see what we get. And I only want you to say yes or no. And if I need clarification, then I will ask but don't give me too much information. So I was pretty comfortable that, you know, I wasn't giving her leading information on you know, giving her the names and the and the circumstances. In this reading Cheryl had my mom come in first, which was really incredible. She didn't expect mom to show up.

00:39:18.809 --> 00:39:22.019
Mama died three years before.

00:39:18.809 --> 00:39:46.500
And some of the information Cheryl gave me was right on target with what my mom had gone through in her life and how she had passed. Then mom brings Matthew as a little boy in the Cheryl's presence. And then, of course, Matthew grows up pretty quick. And Cheryl had so much information about Matt. She had his dog over there with him and his cat. I had forgotten that he had had a cat that had died shortly before he had passed.

00:39:41.280 --> 00:40:17.250
Describe Matthew to a tee. She just had so much information. It was incredible. But she had that feeling that he had died quickly, tragically, but couldn't quite get her fingers on it. And I didn't tell her anything. Finally she says okay, Matthews trying to give me more information Question about his passing. So what he's telling me now, Brian, if you if you have time, I want to tell you what, what she said. Absolutely. Okay.

00:40:08.849 --> 00:40:45.360
Cheryl said, he showed me that he was trying to go to the other side. But instead of going to the other side, he went to the other side. His angels were there. They told him, it's time to go. And they took him to the other side. I'm really not sure what that means. It seems like it was something pretty quick and tragic. It was clear as a bell to me, Brian clear Isabel.

00:40:41.130 --> 00:41:07.349
So I said, Do you want me to tell you how he died? And she said, Yes. Matthew was on one side of that street, he was getting ready to cross over to the other side of the street. He got hit just before stepping on that sidewalk on the other side.

00:40:59.190 --> 00:41:29.250
So the angels came Brian, and told him, it's time to go to the other side. They had him. They had him with him. He didn't see that car, he wasn't meant to see that car. It was time for him to leave to go to the other side of the veil. And they had him in their arms. I got so much healing and relief from that, that, hey, my kid wasn't drunk.

00:41:29.489 --> 00:41:47.909
He wasn't on a death wish. He wasn't ignoring the dangers, he was a kid who would kill a grown man who would take the dogs for walks and always make them stop on that corner. And look both ways and make sure it was safe before they crossed because he had a fear that someday one of them might get out of the yard.

00:41:48.239 --> 00:42:10.170
And they would head over to the dog park on their own and get hit by a car. So you know, it's like it didn't make sense that he would have crossed in a danger zone. Well, he didn't the angels were there. He wasn't meant to be here. He wasn't he was meant to go. And I felt it was just a perfect way to know, he didn't feel anything.

00:42:10.199 --> 00:42:47.639
You know, you always worry when your child dies of something that's tragic, that they were in pain that they suffered. He didn't feel anything, Brian, he didn't feel anything the angels took him. And he was a little confused, according to the medium at first, but they, you know, explained to him what was going on and he was given a choice. You can go back to that body. He was looking at his body and seeing how broken up it was you can go back and they showed him what would happen if he were to return and how his life would be and how my life would be impacted. And he told them no, I don't want to put my mom through that. I'm ready. Let's go. And he left.

00:42:48.148 --> 00:42:50.579
I think that is such an important Dianna point.

00:42:50.579 --> 00:43:04.228
Now I want to interrupt you for just a second because there's so much what you said there was so, so important for people to understand parents who have lost children, our minds tend to go to the worst. Were they in pain?

00:42:59.429 --> 00:43:44.759
Were they were they scared? Were they alone? You know? Did they die alone? And Robin told us like nobody dies alone, we always have someone there to meet his angels, loved ones guides, whatever, that there's typically no pain associated with death, the lot of times the spirit will leave the body before. And then there's always this thing with again, especially with parents, but the other people also, what if, what if the why? Why did my why did they have to die? Why couldn't they come back? And I think sometimes the body's just not viable. And we never know, from this site. What if we think oh, if only they live, we don't know what kind of damage they might have gone through? They don't.

00:43:45.539 --> 00:44:01.349
And you? I mean, I can imagine thinking okay, well, I'm losing my my husband to this thing. And then I lose my son, this is terrible. I want him back. I was just talking to someone yesterday, I want them back. And we'd like we don't know what it'd be like if we had them back.

00:44:02.188 --> 00:44:38.128
Yeah. You're right, you're right. Brian, you don't know what it would be like, it probably depends on the circumstances of everyone's passing. And if it was something tragic like that, you don't know what it would be like to have them back, it might have been much more challenging and difficult. I believe in Matt's case, it would have been a long road to any kind of recovery because he was pretty, you know, battered and broken. And he was able to see that and you know, there's other people who you know, may have come back and things might have been worse for their family and their parents.

00:44:38.489 --> 00:44:48.929
And I think they're given a glimpse as to what it would be like if they stay on the other side, and that they can be more helpful to us on the other side.

00:44:44.429 --> 00:44:59.789
I believe Matthew saw what was coming with his story getting out there and with helping his friends know that life is short and you need to live it now and and enjoy it while you got it.

00:44:56.369 --> 00:45:03.539
This is the theme that Matthew has pushed from that other side.

00:44:59.789 --> 00:45:17.369
And he certainly pushed the store to get out in a book format and to get me out there talking about it, because he wants people to know that, yeah, it's sad that you lose someone you love dearly. But they're going to be okay. They are okay.

00:45:14.608 --> 00:45:27.389
And they're right there with you, pushing you and tried to send you the signs to keep you going and motivated and to know that everything was going to be fine. And you'll be with them at some point in your own future.

00:45:28.378 --> 00:46:01.259
Yeah, well, I think that is, you know, there's lots of lessons in your book and in your story, but one of the one of the lessons is that, uh, can we look at it from the point of that person's life being, quote, cut short, that, that that's the end of their life. And you and I both know, now, that's the furthest thing from the truth, that's not the end of their life, it's not the end of existence. It's not even the end of their influence in this world. Because our children are reaching more people through us than they probably would have reached if they had stayed in the physical.

00:46:03.420 --> 00:46:13.230
Absolutely, absolutely. They have touched so many hearts, with their stories.

00:46:07.320 --> 00:46:39.869
And with them pushing people like you and myself and so many others out there, who are going public, with, with their stories with their emotions with sharing what they have experienced, and especially with you, Brian, and your work and helping people through the grieving process. I mean, it's just remarkable. I know you and I didn't see this coming years ago, right? Back in 2012, we didn't see this 2013.

00:46:39.869 --> 00:47:25.289
And then things started happening. And here we are connecting with each other. And with so many parents who are going through these losses, and not only the parents, you lose a spouse, you lose a parent, you lose a best friend. It's all a grief, differently levels, different layers, different connections you may have with those who have passed over. But in our world, we learned that they're always there, they're helping us they're watching over us, sometimes they can come in and talk to us in a dream or, you know, if we get some mediumship readings or interact with people in this world, or they'll drop in on them and give us a message or a sign it's just remarkable how life is and that afterlife.

00:47:26.250 --> 00:48:25.409
And, and the physical life against listen to Dhamma rebel Merle Calvary is just this morning listening to his son in his interview, and he was talking about the fact that every relationship ends at some point, the physical realm, the physical relationship, either by choice or by a life circumstance or by by one of the people passing know, when we get married. You know, it's interesting, we say in the vows till death do us part because we're we're acknowledging the fact that we are not going to be together physically forever. So every relationship ends we a lot of times against specially with parents, we judge that passing of a child as it wasn't supposed to. And then it doesn't matter whether our child's 1538 I've talked to parents who've lost children, their 50s and 60s, and they still feel like they're not supposed to end before my my life ends. But this is something that you we know it's going to happen eventually to all of us.

00:48:27.719 --> 00:49:38.309
Right, death and taxes that those are the two eternal qualities in our lives is you're going to run into both of them. That is a hard one for us. Because you've lost that physical presence. You can't hug them. I mean, I still have periods where I just miss those guys are terribly watching football, Brian, I mean, I'm not a big sports nut. But Sal and Matt love football. They love baseball. Every year I find myself drawn to watch the NFL playoffs and the Super Bowl if I can doesn't matter who the teams are. It's great when it's a team that Salar Matt loved and supported, but I still watch them and I feel like the guys are with me and that they're cheering or they're booing or they're you know, commenting on you know, the the plays and what have you. I'm still drawn to that. But then I kind of missed it. They're not here and that they're not sharing in you know, the snacks and the chicken wings or whatever it is eating. I have to eat that all by myself. So I don't eat that much. But um yeah, I still miss them a lot.

00:49:38.699 --> 00:50:20.219
Yeah, but I'm on there around me. It would just be nice to have them come up and hug or you know, hear the laugh. Although I do feel some things. Sometimes I shoot in the morning, almost every morning. Something's touching my hair right here and I'm positive it sounds just the light touch. And with math, I'll hear him laugh sometimes I just kind of hear it. It's not clear, but I can just feel him around me laughing because that would be mad. He'd be standing there laughing at everything I do. But they're there. I just wish I could have them in the physical once in a while. My dream is like, I will join you guys one day and we are going to hug man.

00:50:16.708 --> 00:50:22.708
We are gonna hug when I get over there. Good God, we have got to hug.

00:50:23.070 --> 00:50:26.280
Oh, yeah, we will.

00:50:23.070 --> 00:51:01.469
We will. I want to talk to you a little bit more about silent and, and dementia. As I said, I've I've gone through that I just lost my mother in law at this point just a little over a month ago with dementia. I was gonna say I have a theory, but actually, I've seen it. People the matches, sometimes it seems like they allow spirit to break through they they can see and sense things that we can't. And when I was reading your book, the first thing that struck me was Sal on that street, you know, the premonition of Matthews passing. But even after Matthew pass, Sal had some contact with Matthew, it sounds like

00:51:03.780 --> 00:51:18.000
he absolutely did. It was phenomenal when Sal would share stories about Matthew coming in. One in particular touch my heart. One day, Sal says clear as a bell.

00:51:18.329 --> 00:51:28.590
Oh, Matthew came and told me that he will be there when I die. by Matthew, Caitlin said he'd be there when you die. Yes.

00:51:28.800 --> 00:51:32.369
He said that he's learning how to help people when they die.

00:51:32.849 --> 00:52:57.570
And that when it's my time, he'll be there for me. He'll help me pass over. I'll tell you, Brian, that that's remarkable that Sal would have said that. And it makes sense that yeah, Matthew would certainly be there. One Sal passes over. I felt Matthew's presence in those hours before Sal pass. We kept Sal here at the house through hospice. And he passed here at the home. And there was a lot of energies going on before his passing. Now the time Sal says to me, Oh, my mom and Matthew were here. Now I'd never met Sally's mom. She died in the 50s when he was, you know, a teenager. And I had never met her. I have her portrait hanging up in the house. I know what she looks like. But I had never met the woman. But here she is with Matthew according to sow common the visit. So I thought that was really cool. That sounds mom and Matthew had never met in the physical. We're hanging out together. On the other side. Sal would sometimes have visits from his deceased relatives, his brother, his brother in law. His sister had died months before South Passover, she also had had dementia. And he felt her presence shortly after she died, and was talking about her being here. So that was rather interesting. I didn't write that in the book. But it's he she was visiting him. They had been very close when they were growing up.

00:52:58.380 --> 00:53:17.010
So he had a lot of visitors here. There were times he would talk about people. He would react sometimes I would see him talking to someone. And I'd say who are you talking to? And settle spoke Spanish. He grew up in Mexico, and I often had trouble understanding what he was telling me with dementia.

00:53:17.219 --> 00:53:44.280
They have a harder time vocalizing so we come out a little slurred I'd have to call up one of his relatives and say, Would you happen to know who else Zorro was? And they tell me Oh, yeah, that was, you know, my deals best friend back in the, you know, 50s and 60s, that was his nickname. So Okay. Could you tell me who l fail was? Oh, well, yeah, it was a guy he worked with, he was pretty ugly.

00:53:41.099 --> 00:53:46.949
And it's like, Wow, sounds having all these conversations.

00:53:44.280 --> 00:53:56.099
I don't know most of these folks. But when he would have, you know, Matthew show up, or his mom, or someone that I did know, that was pretty remarkable. It happened quite a bit.

00:53:56.699 --> 00:54:32.068
And what to say to people. My father in law went through something similar. And this was many years before I had any kind of this kind of understanding, and we dismissed them as hallucinations. And we talked and I don't know if there might be real hallucinations too. But I know a lot of this stuff is real. And in his particular case, he would only talk about people who had passed away. I mean, it wasn't like he was saying the guy down the road came to visit and the neighbor that was it was always somebody who we had known that was no longer in the physical. And it was years later before I realized I think he was actually being visited by people.

00:54:33.960 --> 00:54:51.570
You know, the one salad on hospice and you know, I met with the doctor who ran the program. And I had mentioned to him that Sal was claiming to be visiting some of these dead people. The doctors first response is, oh, well, that's just part of dementia.

00:54:48.239 --> 00:54:51.570
It's just hallucination.

00:54:52.110 --> 00:55:40.679
Sometimes if it gets bad, there's some medications we could do, but that's all it is just ignored. And I know that in reading about Lewy Body disease, And then all of the stages that the people may go through that are suffering from it. That that's often dismissed the stories of visited visitors from the other realms as hallucinations. Now tell you it sounded hallucinate at times, sometimes that we get pretty scary. But as lucid nations were more about what was happening now, like when he thought I was some bad guy that was kidnapping him and was taking him somewhere to kill him. That's a hallucination was how it escaped from the house and head off down the road. And I'd have to go and get him. And fortunately, I'd have somebody around to help me.

00:55:36.269 --> 00:55:53.190
That was a hallucination. He wasn't running home to mama, he was running away because he thought he was in a facility and I was the chief medical officer and I was going to murder him or some crazy thing. She was sort of a loser. Yeah.

00:55:54.059 --> 00:57:01.289
Yeah, I so it's I want people that are listening, if you if you're dealing with someone with dementia, or even in the stages of life, you know, their listen, and try to observe because it's separate, like, what's what's clearly Lusatian versus maybe they aren't getting visits. And there's something about the brain soul connection, it seems like when that starts to break down, it's like, allows spirit to come through, it's like, they can start to see the other side because you're not as connected here. But let's talk about where you where you are today. Because, you know, it's kind of it's wild that the connections because when I think about you and helping parents heal, and with me, I started listening to podcasts, and I ran into somebody who was a friend of Suzanne's and they gifted me a reading. So the first meeting bringing Abraham was with Suzanne. So we've got that connection in common as well. So you the first medium that you were going to reach out to was Suzanne, and you decided to do someone else. Then later on, you came back around and you have relationship with her now.

00:57:02.760 --> 00:57:05.219
Right, right.

00:57:02.760 --> 00:58:51.000
It's interesting, you know how all of that came to fruition. It wasn't something I had anticipated. You know, like I said, after Matt had died, I had time to learn about mediums and I read voraciously, lots of books. In 2016, January 2016, Sal crossed over. And after his passing, I had lots of free time, I really didn't have a whole lot to do when you're a caregiver, and all of that goes away. You're kind of sitting here twiddling your thumbs, I decided that it was now time for me to really delve into learning more about that after live in spirit communications and, you know, things that I had read about but hadn't had time to really delve into. So I looked further I stumbled into Suzanne Giesemann and her book Wolf's message during my reading before Sal died. Notice that shortly after Sal passed in early 2016, Guzman was coming to the Phoenix area and doing several classes and workshops, and one class was like beginning mediumship. So I signed up for everything I could because I liked you know her book, I wanted to learn more to kind of a basic mediumship class and through those I met a handful of people that were kind of her followers, or groupies they really enjoy interacting with her body year later, I was invited to be part of a group called souls awakening, which was composed of a lot of people who had met through policeman's classes. And it was a lot of fun to be invited to that group.

00:58:45.210 --> 00:59:03.389
Prior to that invitation, though, I had to go through that one year anniversary of Sal's death. And it was a challenging one, I didn't realize it would be so difficult. I thought I had my stuff together, so to speak.

00:59:04.019 --> 00:59:10.800
And I can handle it. So I had gotten into a practice of doing a meditation every morning, I would use a guided meditation.

00:59:10.980 --> 00:59:27.690
So that morning, been a year, I thought, Well, I'm gonna do a meditation. Maybe I'll hear from Sal today. And I opened up my computer and I had a touch screen and I pull up the folder that had all of the audio files.

00:59:21.750 --> 01:00:24.150
And I hit something on the upper was at the upper left corner, which was supposed to be a meditation, and prepared to listen and instead started playing a song, which was the ill Devo version of my way. I fell apart because once I was in his last stages, I had put together a little video of photos and songs to show people at the celebration we did for him and the very first song was the ill Devo song My Way Sal had always told me that My song when I die, you play my way. So when I put it together I didn't choose the Elvis Presley or the Frank Sinatra version. I liked the ille de Vocus out being Mexican and a Spanish speaker el Divo doesn't mix of Spanish and English. I thought it was a beautiful rendition. So that starts playing and it just like, melted me. I couldn't take it.

01:00:20.579 --> 01:00:24.150
Oh my god, I can't believe this.

01:00:24.239 --> 01:01:14.550
And why is that playing? I did not touch that. I did not touch that I saw you did this. And I'm I just had a hard time. I mean, it was like gray, that's a sign from cell. But it put me in a funk. And that funk lasted for days for days. So after all about a week, I was hoping for a sign I needed a sign and I asked for it. I was feeling like I was stagnating. And I needed something. Went to bed one night had a dream and the dream. I'm seeing Sal, I'm seeing a feather I'm seeing piece of paper. I'm meeting with Suzanne Giesemann in the dream really an odd one, I wake up, I get around to opening the computer that morning. And Eastman would post something every day from her team called Sanaya of daily message and there'd be a photo.

01:01:15.059 --> 01:01:34.320
And the first message was stagnation. And I'm like, Whoa, you know, that's just what I was feeling last night, I need a sign and I'm thinking I'm stagnating. I read the message, I resonated with everything in that message. It's, it was calling to me it was my message.

01:01:29.579 --> 01:01:34.320
The photo she had was a feather.

01:01:34.590 --> 01:01:49.800
It was sitting in a wedding ring, there's a piece of paper under it. It's like oh my god, that's like the dream. This is just crazy. I reached out to Eastman and I said, Hey, I've been in a funk. This is what's been going on. And then this is what happened. And this message is meant for me. I just know it.

01:01:50.489 --> 01:02:52.440
He's been writes back and says, Well, you know, that's really incredible. I think it is for you. I'm begging, I'm sure of it. So we had a little back and forth. And she gave me some ideas on you know how to get out of that funk and move forward with life, which was great. So here we'd have this little interaction. Up to three weeks later, it was shortly after I had been invited to this group of hers as souls awakening group that I get a call from geese men, and she says, Hey, Diane, do you know Suzanne Wilson? And I said, Well, yes, I know who she is. I've gone to a helping parents heal meeting a month before she was the presenter. I had said hello to her. I'm sure she doesn't know me. Why? Well, she's looking for assistant, a part time assistant. And she reached out and I thought of you. And so I'm like, Oh, wow, part time. What can I work from home? Because I don't want to be driving down to carefree to do any kind of work. That's a long drive. She said, Oh, yeah, from home just part time. If you're interested, I'll let her know.

01:02:52.559 --> 01:03:06.989
So sure. I'm interested. So Wilson calls me a little bit later. And she introduces herself and I said, Yeah, we met but I'm sure you don't remember me. And I don't think she remembered me. But because lots of people go up and talk to her.

01:03:07.590 --> 01:03:14.010
So she said, Yeah, I need an assistant. And I was looking for someone who had some idea about mediumship and how that works.

01:03:14.010 --> 01:03:54.630
And I'd reached out to Suzanne Kaseman my friend, because I thought maybe she would know someone and she said, she did call me back and gave me your name. Are you interested? And I said, Yeah, I am. We mentioned a little bit of the details. But then she said to me, you know, it's kind of funny. After I hung up with gatesman, I put the phone down. And the ceiling fan kicked on in the room there. And I looked at it and Carl, my husband looked at it and we noticed the remote is sitting on the table and no one had touched it. But that fan was going and I told her Oh, that's my son. Your son said, yeah. I lost my son.

01:03:54.630 --> 01:04:17.340
His name's Matt. He had installed the ceiling fans at my house. And often when I would have visitors hear family or I could be in the room on the phone talking to his old girlfriend or whoever. Those fans would kick on. No reason they just kick on. So we figured that was a sign for math. So I think he turned your fan off.

01:04:13.739 --> 01:05:08.699
And Suzanne says, Oh my gosh, okay, hold on, hold on. Just all right. I see him. He's standing right next to you. His hand is on your shoulder. And he says, yeah, that was me. So hey, Brian. There's my reading with Suzanne Wilson. She's got my kids standing here. He's playing with us. He had known Suzanne gatesman He knew I had read wills message he had popped in and given her reading through her to me, you know, a long time before. So there was a connection there. I guess he heard Eastman and Wilson talking about needing an assistant and I thought, Aha, mom's just sitting there doing nothing feeling sorry for herself. Let's make a connection. So that's how I started working. was Suzanne Wilson. And that was in 2017. So that's Gosh, it's almost seven years since I started working with her, Brian Yeah. Well, I

01:05:08.730 --> 01:05:38.070
there's so much more, and I appreciate you share that. But I do want to let people know, it's an it's in the book. So if I can ever get it, right, they're living in loving life all day, every day, which was something that Matthew said that they came from him the title, I love that. And thanks, Diane, for sharing, like, you know, helping us realize the universe is really a magical place. And then again, we've just, we just skimmed the surface here today, of your story, and how all these things tie together, connect together.

01:05:38.610 --> 01:05:55.050
And, you know, for parents that, you know, we get to a certain point in life, you know, you know, starting over is, it's kind of a daunting thing I can make imagine you being retired, probably thought, what am I going to do, and you're living as you're now you're a medium.

01:05:51.719 --> 01:05:58.260
So you're a medium yourself, we didn't really talk about that.

01:05:55.050 --> 01:06:07.110
But because of you meeting Susanna and develop your mediumship you're doing that and writing books. So I know you have another book plan. So tell me about the other book that you got planned.

01:06:08.340 --> 01:06:47.369
I do have another book planned. It's right now I'm titling it finding the medium within. Part of the reason for writing the second book is that in doing the first one, I had a lot of stories about hearing from Matthew hearing from south, being in development circles, practicing mediumship, doing an awful lot of communicating with with others in the spirit world. And I wanted it in the first book, I had a person who was helping me with the editing. And she suggested that's a bit too much.

01:06:43.079 --> 01:07:48.389
Let's pull that out and think about a second book where you can go into those stories. The first book, we're just talking mostly about Matthew and the incredible signs that he was giving and how it led you to where you are today. So book two will be a little bit more about that background, that that inner communication through mediums as a medium, getting more signs from spirit, Matthew, Sal, mom, dad, I mean, I have a whole plethora of people in spirit who have been coming in. So I'm working on putting together a story that I hope will inspire people to consider medium readings and consider maybe being mediums if they're so drawn. Because that spirit world is incredible. And and and a lot of the books I had read, the most exciting parts to me were when someone would say, oh, so we have this medium reading. And this is what happened. And I would like devour that like, Oh, what happened? What spirits saying? So I'm hoping my book will give a little more insight as to what spirit does, how they come in and what they like to talk about. Yeah,

01:07:48.420 --> 01:07:55.230
well, there's a lot of great stuff in this book. And I'm looking forward to the second one. So let people know how they can reach you.

01:07:56.579 --> 01:08:05.309
Oh, well, I have a website. We're still kind of working out the kinks. But you can go to Diane calderon.com.

01:08:05.668 --> 01:08:43.918
Take a look at the website. I have started a little blog post, I have one blog. I have links to some of the other interviews I may have participated in and anything coming up will go in there. I have links to purchasing the book. The book, again is living and loving life all day, every day. It is available on Amazon, I believe you can go to a little bookstore and ask them to order it. It should be available for that venue too. Yeah. So that's how you reach me. You can just go to the website, there's a place to put in your contact information and I respond to whatever comes in. So thank you. Sounds

01:08:43.920 --> 01:08:45.899
great. Well, Diane, thanks so much for doing this.

01:08:45.899 --> 01:08:48.810
Thanks for being here today.

01:08:45.899 --> 01:08:52.050
Thanks for sharing Matthew and Sal with us and enjoy the rest of your day.

01:08:53.099 --> 01:08:59.279
Thank you so much, Brian. I again, I appreciate it. Love you, man.

01:08:55.979 --> 01:09:10.708
Love you from the day I first met you and Ty, which you know, it's been a while it was like seven years ago. I think we met at St. Peter's Burg. Yeah, with my dick and Suzanne Giesemann.

01:09:07.349 --> 01:09:12.779
So you guys are wonderful people and God bless you. Yeah,

01:09:12.810 --> 01:09:13.859
enjoy the rest of your day.

01:09:14.520 --> 01:09:14.939
Thank you
Diane Calderon Profile Photo

Diane Calderon

Author

Diane is the client services manager for Susanne Wilson the Carefree Medium.

Prior to working with Susanne beginning in early 2017, Diane had retired after decades working in various levels of government - local, county, state, and federal. Community organizer, training coordinator, research & statistician, postal worker, and union officer. At one point in her career Diane was the Deputy Director for the Governor’s Office of Affirmative Action, serving under Arizona’s first female governor - Rose Mofford!

Shortly after taking a retirement Diane found herself being the full time caregiver for her husband during his struggle with Lewy Body Dementia.

While moving through the challenges of helping her husband, her life was drastically changed by the tragic death of her son.

His death, unexpected and tragic, became the turning point in Diane’s life.

Seeking answers and understanding about the afterlife, Diane began a journey of reading, investigating, understanding the survival of consciousness and knowing that love never dies.

Her book, Living & Loving Life All Day Every Day is the story about how a phenomenal spiritual transformative experience led her through grief to a place of understanding, and eventually learning how to connect with spirit through the sacred practice of mediumship.