The Doctors Gave Her Three Years- She Said "Watch This" - Dr. Wendy Slattery EP 417

Brian Smith  0:00  
Close your eyes and imagine. What if the things in life that cause us the greatest pain, the things that bring us grief, are challenges, challenges designed to help us grow to ultimately become what we were always meant to be. We feel like we've been buried. But what if, like a seed. We've been planted, and having been planted, we grow to become a mighty tree. Now open your eyes. Open your eyes to this way of viewing life. Come with me as we explore your true, infinite, eternal nature. This is grief to growth, and I am your host. Brian Smith, Hi everyone. Welcome to grief, to growth. I'm your host. Brian Smith, and I want to thank you for tuning in today. Whether you're a first time listener or you've been with me on this journey for a while. I'm so glad you're here. This is a podcast where we navigate life's challenges together, exploring the big questions like who we are, why we're here and what lies ahead. My goal is to help guide you along the way through your life's toughest moments. Will help you find purpose and peace along the way. Today, I'm thrilled to welcome a truly remarkable guest. Her name is Dr Wendy Slattery. Dr Slater's life story is one of resilience, of reinvention and profound inspiration. Diagnosed with terminal cancer, Dr Slattery made the bold decision to retire early from her celebrate celebrated career as infectious disease physician, but follow was an extraordinary journey into writing, storytelling and leaving a legacy, not just for her grandchildren, but for all of us who are willing to embrace life's uncertainties. Growing up in a North Dakota farm in the 1950s Wendy defied societal expectations for women and fought to achieve her dream of becoming a doctor, finally realizing that goal at the age of 46 her career was nothing short of distinguished, earning recognition as one of the top doctors in the Minneapolis Saint Paul area, and receiving awards for leadership and excellence. But it's when she's accomplished after a diagnosis, after a diagnosis, that's going to leave you awestruck. So today's conversation will explore how she's faced her terminal diagnosis head on, how she's reconnected with the dreams of her childhood and how she's learned to live life on the edge of the unseen world. We'll talk about what it means to accept death in order to fully embrace life. We'll talk about the process of healing from a place of despair, and how she's discovered meaning and beauty even in the face of immense adversity, her journey is detailed in her book, the edge of the unseen world, a doctor's journey from the imaginary to the impossible, and through her many documentary which you can see find your website at Wendy slattery.com so hopefully, By the end of this episode, you not only feel inspired, but also empowered to make courageous choices in your own life, no matter what challenges you're facing. And remember, if you want to keep the conversation going, join me at grief to growth.com/community afterwards. And with that, like to welcome Wendy Slattery,

Wendy Slattery  2:59  
thank you, Brian, so much. It's an honor to be on your podcast. You've done so much for so many people. Thank you. I will start by probably my most recent piece of news, which wasn't there a few weeks ago, but my terminal cancer has relapsed, which puts me in a new set of grief, for which I need a new set of growth. And so let me just explain a little bit about the it happened about, it's seven years ago, exactly January of 2018 I was in, I was working, you know, in infectious diseases, the job I loved, absolutely loved, and I'd seen my doctor a routine visit, and she had ordered some labs, but I on Friday night, I had not yet heard from her, and I didn't know why, so I decided I would get into my chart myself, because I'm a physician, I got into the chart, and what I saw, I couldn't believe, right before my eyes, was a terminal blood cancer, multiple myeloma. And in 2018 it's come a long ways, I'll say. But in 2018 it was a death sentence of a probably three years, and I was feeling great. I was working full time. I was at the pinnacle of my my profession. I absolutely got struck down like a tree chopped down in the forest. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I was dying right before my very eyes, I could see it. So that began a journey of trying to figure out what I could do. I had three grandchildren. Those are her grand kids. Jenica is my daughter's with me. Hello. 10, and they were six, eight and 10 at the time, and I wasn't. I did not want them to not know who I was. If I was going to be gone in three years at best, maybe it's going to be an ugly ending too. I needed them to know what my life was okay, so I wanted to show them in a story, one story after the next, so that they could get a picture of who their Nana was. It turned out that everybody loved the story telling I started in my childhood, but so I wrote the book The edge of the unseen world, because in that book, there is a lifetime of moments where I was on the edge of the unseen world, that spot where the veil is thin between you and your Creator. And I'm going to begin with the very first story that probably is the most memorable. And it was profound because I was 12 years old, and I wanted those kids to know that there was a world out there we can't see. We didn't know there was a God who created us. And I know that in your your website, you talk about the the frustration of religion, religion in your childhood. I understand that totally, because I did too. Growing up in a Lutheran background that was very fundamental. I did not know that God was really there. I didn't know that he cared any he's running the universe. He's got a lot to do. Why would he care about me? I just didn't think he could. And at the same time, this is the 1950s and the 1960s where girls are truly second class citizens. And growing up on a marginal farm, we had sheep, and I was going to be a doctor. And so I had a lot of plans, but none of those things could come true for me, because I'm a girl. They don't give degrees to medical they don't they don't accept girls into medical school, because surely they're going to quit and go have babies. So they just can't do it anyway. Let me go back. I'm 12 years old, and this is probably the first time that I experienced severe grief. I had a sister who was autistic, and in those days, different was not celebrated, and she was teased a lot. And in a small community, small school, real, real Township. Everybody knows everybody, and they made fun of her. They made fun of her terribly, uh, the worst part was on the bus, going, coming and going to school, and she was four years older than I was, and I did not know how to protect her. I didn't know I'm too young. And I was getting really angry at God for not making her better and taking away that, that the behavioral issues of autism and making her better and it she was kind of eaten up like a bird by A bunch of hyenas every time on the bus. But those were attacks against me, because she was my sister, and I was praying often, honestly, God, make her, heal her. Why can't you heal her? I mean, if you raise Lazarus from the dead and you heal people, and you did all these things, then why? Why can't you heal my sister? Gail? Anyway, it kind of amplified. And one particular day I came home from the school bus, I ran upstairs to my bedroom. I'm looking out the bedroom window and I'm literally crying, and I am angry, and I put up, I throw down the gauntlet. If you really are who you say you are, then I demand that you heal her. I demand it. I'm only 12, yeah, I don't know if you can demand anything at 12, but I was, I was demanding it. If you have to show me you're who you are, or I won't believe you. And at all I'm not going to believe you because you can't do it, or you won't do it. And I'm 12, and she all those were injuries to me. Anyway. Then all of a sudden, the world changed in the atmosphere around me and that very thin veil. Honestly, I'm 12. I can't make this up. It's got so thin. And did he enter the room? Did he enter my periphery? I don't know, but he was there, and I could feel him, and I could hear him crying. Okay. He was crying too. Every injury against my sister not only hurt me, but it also hurt him. And he said, Wendy, I made her exactly the way I wanted to perfect, and she will be part of making you who I want you to be. At that moment, I'm 12 years old, and I I was different from then on. I never asked again. I never questioned it again. I understood exactly my role and her role in my life, and I knew for the first time in my life that that Lutheran background that I grew up with was okay. It was a wonderful church. It was all those things that you hoped it would be, but I knew now there was a God, and I knew that it was for real. And that's where I began, 12 years old, and that was the first enormous grief for which I had instant growth, and it would take me a little further. Now, that's not to say I didn't have challenges yet to come, sure, because I'm still a girl, and I'm a girl of the 50s and the 60s, and all the things I want to do in life, I can't do. I want to be a doctor, but I can't be it. But I didn't want to get married to a farmer. God forbid, I would end up on the farm, raising pigs and babies. I don't want to do that, not to say anything wrong about farmers. That's my life I grew up with. However, I couldn't do that, and I didn't want to live at home anymore. I needed to branch out, so I decided I'd go to college, because there was no other choice. So I went to college, and I was floundering as to what I wanted to be in life, so I just ended up with a major in four years, and it didn't matter. It didn't interest me, but I got it, but it's home economics. Home Economics. They don't even call it home economics anymore, because it's two women's liberal they've changed that world. It's now called, what's it called now for

Jenny Slattery  12:16  
domestic engineering, yeah, domestic

Wendy Slattery  12:19  
and then it was consumer sciences. I don't know what it is, but it wasn't it's never been home economics for a long, long time. So I graduated and but now that now we're into the 70s, and it's an angry time for that generation. We're mad. We're mad at the older people all the rules ahead of us. We don't think they know anything. Our parents, for heaven's sakes, no, the sexual revolution kind of took over. There was politics, there was the war, the event now, war, everything was changing. So whatever I had at 12 years old kind of lost it a little bit, and but there was a core of it, for sure, that kind of led me through a difficult time of my 70s and 80s. So but again, you know, things kind of fall apart. When I lost it, it fell apart. I lost my marriage. Lost several things, but in the end, I heard that voice again, and I was now 38 years old, and it was time now to go to medical school. 38 years old, but I had never taken a science class. I had a 2.7 you don't get into medical school with a 2.7 my AC t score was poor. This would take an incredible miracle to get through to make a long story short, I didn't make it. I made it in and the first shot, but all by the grace of God, there went I and I made it in. And then hence the years I spent in medicine and Jenica, you could probably shed a little bit of light on what your observation was during those years, because now you're born and and you show up and you watch me as a 12 year old now, you're 12, you're 12, yeah, and you're going, you're watching your mother go through medical school. So I was the only mother, yeah, yeah. And yeah, you

Jenny Slattery  14:33  
started medical school and I started seventh grade on the same

Wendy Slattery  14:36  
day, right? Wow.

Jenny Slattery  14:37  
Yeah. It was surreal. It was, it was unique experience for a junior high kid. Mm, hmm.

Wendy Slattery  14:45  
But in those go, I'm sorry, Brian,

Brian Smith  14:47  
go ahead. That's, that's incredible amount of determination to start medical school. So did you? Did you hear that same type of not voice necessary, that same inspiration from God saying, now it's time? Yeah. Yeah.

Wendy Slattery  15:00  
I mean, there were a series of events that happened that I'm sitting on the couch and that thin veil shows up and Wendy, it's time to go to medical school. I said, God, I can't I'm 38 of course, I haven't had a science class that would take me three years to pick up all the sciences required to get even applied medical school. God, I got a 2.7 they're not going to let me in. But you know, well, go ahead, Jenny, and

Jenny Slattery  15:32  
just a little bit of extra context around that too, the season in which you felt that push into what I could argue, is your destiny. I mean, you're you're built to be that doctor. But that push came in a season that I would call for very difficult, if not dark, because I know that the and the book goes into this in detail, so we don't need to go down the rabbit hole. But I know that that was a very difficult a very difficult season for you and dad at the enterprise. My parents started a small business when I was two, and around the time that she's talking about this, it was a really, really hard season in the business. It was a hard season in their interpersonal areas, in the business. I mean, it was a very difficult season. I'll leave that chapter of the book to tell itself. But basically it was, I would say there's a very dark cloud over it. And I think sometimes it's, it's those moments when things are dark and things are quiet that you kind of get the push that was exactly right. You're open to the push when you're sitting in our room and it's dark and quiet and it's that's kind of where you were in life. I mean, it was a season that was very hard, but that was the quietness that allowed you to kind of feel that push.

Wendy Slattery  16:57  
You know, it's time. Thank you very much for bringing that up, because I believe that it's in our most despairing moments for which we seek those things. We seek it and we well, I was 12 when I heard from God, when I was so angry at it. And you're right, Jenny, it was a push, because it was dark, I had to do this and but some reason, by the grace of God, there was enormous belief that I was going to make it. How in the world was I going to make it? I started so I go to this small community college, pick up my science classes, and then I fulfill all those requirements. I go, go to the University of Minnesota. And I said, Would you look at my transcript and think, would you tell me what you think? And she blew it apart. She said, You'll never get in. You're 42 for heaven's sakes. You did this at a community college. You know, your science is for heaven's sakes. We don't even think about community colleges. And she gave me five more reasons for which I was such a bad candidate. I walked out every balloon had been popped, and I thought, shoot, I just spent the last three years picking up everything to make this happen. And my husband great, as he is, said, Wendy, she's a people paper pusher. She pushes paper from this side, and then in the morning, in the afternoon, she pushes it there, and then she goes, pushes it the paper over there, and at the end of the day, she pushes it one more time before she goes home. That's all she can do is push paper. She can't take you out of medical school. And he was right. I got I applied to six places. It got rejected by five of them, and the last one showed up positive. It was fabulous. Wow.

Brian Smith  18:48  
Anyway, so I would imagine, I What was, what was it like when you were telling people, okay, I've got how many children at the time, was it one? Just one? Yep, just, you've got Jenny, but you're you're like, I'm going to go to medical school. I've got a child, I'm married, I've never taken what kind of reactions were you getting from people around you? Oh,

Jenny Slattery  19:09  
go ahead, Jenny, yes, the best is when they would look through like, Do you know how old you'll be, yeah, when you're done, yeah. Do you know how old you'll be when you're done? I mean, she had so many people say that to her. And finally, a cousin of hers, who's actually who had kind of paved the way for the family. He went to college, he went to get his doctorate. He was in science. He said, Wendy, you're going to be that old anyway. Yeah, the clock is ticking. Do it now?

Wendy Slattery  19:37  
And that was, I hung on to that, that belief from that cousin of mine. I mean, we, I had, you know, 40 cousins, and several of them didn't think I could do it, but anyway, he did, and I, I hung on to beliefs that I could do it, but I also had that belief in that very dark time that, yes, indeed, I have to do this. Okay. And and everything fell into place. What was the other people? I guess some of my other friends did. They couldn't see me as a doctor. They couldn't, I don't, you know, why would you do this? What if you don't get accepted for heaven's sakes, then you'll be a year older. I mean, really. So there was a lot of opposition, and some people just didn't say anything. They were afraid to say anything. Yeah, but we had to move. We had to move to Duluth, Minnesota, which was about 250 well, 250 miles away, north in the cold, Arctic part of Minnesota, and that's where I started medical school two years and then I joined the University of Minnesota for the third and fourth year back in Minneapolis. But I took Jenny with me. She went to a school not far from the medical school, and the librarian kindly brought her over to the medical school at the end of the day, so I didn't have to be interrupted from my classes.

Jenny Slattery  21:09  
It's a delightful community. It really was

Wendy Slattery  21:13  
a class of 50, you know, or 50 of us in the class. And anyway, it was fabulous. I I loved the journey. I loved the destination. But then I come to seven years ago. I mean, the The years passed so quite quickly. It was amazing how fast time went, the older you get. And then, you know, seven years ago today, I got that diagnosis, and I couldn't believe that God would take this away from me, sure, and my health. Why? I mean, I've been healthy all my life. I've ran, I've done other things, I've been healthy, and now all of a sudden, I'm dying. It didn't, it didn't equate. So I've now entered into another very, very dark time, very dark, and it's what prompted me to look at what I was going through from a doctor's perspective. So that's really, it's not the whole book. It's really the last quarter of the book, the journey through cancer and its survival.

Jenny Slattery  22:24  
But may I, may I interrupt you just for a moment mom, because when most people say that they mean their journey through cancer, she approaches it like a kid on a farm with this wild imagination, and she describes, like medically Correct, exactly what's happening with the chemo and the body, but it's like, I think at one point you even have like, little Bilbo Baggins, you know, rafting through the bloodstream. Like, what is he seeing? Because he's looking, yeah, kayaking through the through the bloodstream. What does he see in this landscape of the the bone marrow that's been obliterated by this, you know, nuclear chemo. I mean, it's, it's so imaginative that it's entertaining, and then it's like, Oh, my word was I just entertained by a chemo description, but, but that's, that's what she was sharing on Caring Bridge, and it, it was that little spark of light that her imagination could do that I think that helped you, mom, to process what you were going through. You let yourself be yourself. I mean, no other doctor, no other patient, could describe that that way, but you let yourself really just lean into who you really were back on the farm, the little girl, the little girl with this wild imagination, and you're taking us into that unseen world, in this case, the microscopic world, but we got to go on that journey with you, and I think that kind of helped process. I mean, we know that, you know, writing things out and expressing things can help us, you know, navigate what we're going through, but you did it in such a unique way that I think you were able to express yourself in a way that you really hadn't for many years. And it brought out this whole nother side of you that I got to watch kind of reawaken. You were imaginary. You were just lighting up. And people were like, Wow, your mom is a great writer, and I'm like, really I didn't know that because you were always so sciencey. And here you are taking us on a story. It woke something up in you that I think wouldn't have ever awakened, if not for that very I mean, it was a very dark period, and if not for that, it wouldn't have, wouldn't have come out. And it was really fun to watch.

Wendy Slattery  24:38  
And they were posted on Caring Bridge time after time. But I remember Clarence, my grandson and I were Alice, were reading The Hobbit at the same time, yeah, and I knew that he could identify if I could just describe it, and you know, there'd be these ribbons of DNA floating in the wind with the. Litter of green and and the kayaking and these little hemoglobins rolling, you know, tumbling through the bloodstream without their safe red blood cell and, and, anyway, so you're right. So I It was a glorious time for me to do that, because I did it as a child. And there is, there's another quite amazing miracle through all of this, and that is, I never read a book Growing up, right? I never read. I read two books in my seventh through 12th grade. I wasn't a reader. I I didn't like it, I didn't like the printed page, so I had that doubt as to whether I could even go to medical school. However, I found the science to be everything for me, and the imagination would take over that but. But it wasn't until I real recognize audible books that now, oh, I too, can read audible now, because I'm not a printed page person, but I could audibly listen. And in my transport back and forth to the hospital, I would read book after book after book. And it was that was a that was a miracle to me, because now I can be a well read person, just like other people can be. But

Brian Smith  26:21  
you were, you, you had to medical school, you had to read then. So you're really, you were, okay, science books, but the other stuff just didn't grab you. Or

Wendy Slattery  26:30  
no. I mean, I was an Agatha Christie fan because it was a mystery, but I really kind of didn't too much else. Okay, my grandkids are reading more books in their their 12 years of school. I mean, way more than I ever read. I'm on the farm. Yeah,

Jenny Slattery  26:52  
yeah, that. But also, I mean, you may have also, I not to, I don't know, diagnose you, but you may have had some undiagnosed dyslexia, just by the rate at which you mix up words all the time. It's a family joke. I mean, she'll, she'll switch words around. It's amazing, and it's fun because my husband does the same thing. And so it's, it's very fun for us. We don't play Scrabble together. We can't do it, but that's what I mean. You wrote a book. It's amazing. It is amazing. You actually wrote a book. And I I cannot, I can't always communicate to people. What a monumental accomplishment that is, because they know you is very well educated and very well spoken. And I'm like, No, you don't understand.

Wendy Slattery  27:38  
Like she didn't read as a child, she hated

Jenny Slattery  27:42  
the written word. It just, it didn't connect with her. It, you know, she would try to communicate. She's like, what's that word? And it's, it didn't come naturally. So this is not necessarily the natural habitat, and yet it is. And it's so cool to see as this, this whole new development, if you became a writer, and it's a it's a good book. It's really good. And I'm very I was your editor, so,

Brian Smith  28:06  
yeah, so I can, I wonder what it was like though. I mean, you, you're such a fighter, right? And you, and you go against, like, Okay, girls, can't be doctors. I'm, you know, I'm going to become a doctor. You go through the, you know, the trouble this and you get your medical degree, finally, at that advanced stage in life will cause, it probably seems at the time, and then it's taken away from you. I mean, I can't imagine how dark that must have felt. It

Wendy Slattery  28:35  
was awful. It was despair like I have never known before. It was my world. Was what I loved. I loved the journey. I loved all of it, and it was now gone, and I didn't understand why God would do this to me. What did I do wrong? What did I do wrong? Of course, I came to learn that I didn't do anything wrong, but it took me seven years to figure that out, sure, but I went into remission, and then it came back in 2021, and that the treatment at that point for me was pretty god awful, because the first thing that happened is I went blind with This new, this new, brand new FDA approved drug, and I can't see for five days, and I tell my doctor I'm quitting. I'm going to die. I'll be okay with that. If God promised me 20 years, I don't want them anymore. He can have them all back. I don't want them. He promised me them 20 years in one of those thin moments, thin bail moments, and I didn't want them anymore because I couldn't suffer through the cancer treatment. But in those that was a dark time too. I heard honestly. I heard I would. Go into remission, and I'm waiting for my bone marrow biopsy to show up, only to find out when it does come back, no cancer was found. That was a miracle, incredibly beautiful miracle, and got me to today, 2025, and at Christmas Day, like I said earlier, when we first started on Christmas Day, I learned that the cancer was back. So I guess I get Do I go through that enormous despair again? Or or what my doctor has planned for me what's called the car T therapy, and I've decided that for my survival, I will do that. It isn't a fun to think about, but I'll tell you what it is the car T therapy is now. I'll tell you, seven years ago, I went through the stem cell transplant, and three days later, I went into septic shock. However, I'll say that that's all said and done, but now the car T therapy is where they will extract or harvest my killer T cells. It's an immune cell. They will take them out. In fact, it's planned here for about two weeks from now, they will put a line in my neck, and they'll ship out all my blood into this washing machine that with a centrifuge, and they will extract the T cells and give me back the rest of my blood. It's a beautiful, big science for today, and then they will ship them off to boot camp. I call it Boot Camp, where these, these killer T cells, will be genetically engineered killers, real, real killers. And then they will come back to me about six weeks later. So I anticipate mid March, where I will go through a new well, they'll come back, and they will I don't know what's going to happen. Actually, it's going to be, it's not easy. It'll be about 100 days of of difficulty getting through it. Other people have gotten through it. I plan to get through it too. I still think that God has promised me those 20 years and Brian, I've got three things that I I hang on to. Number one, I have the faith. I have the faith that I will be healed. I do. It's not a question to me. It was seven years ago, but it wasn't it isn't today. Secondly, I have the belief that I will be healed, like in the Bible, the the man whose son was sick, Jesus asks him if you believe that I can heal you. And he said, I do, but help my unbelief. I can tell you I believe it. I don't need any more belief. I believe it. And thirdly, I believe he's going to heal me. So I just hope it's on this side of heaven that heals me, not in heaven, which is a possibility too. But I believe that I will be healed now. I still have to go through the storm. I have to go through the car T therapy. I gotta go through the storm, the 100 days of misery, but in the end, it's kind of like going through a tunnel. When I go through that tunnel, what am I going to look like at the end of the tunnel? When I come out, I pray God that I will be the same today, then as today, and that is my belief, and I have the faith for it, and I do know that there are times when that healing eventually does take place in heaven. I understand that. I do pray it happens on this side of heaven, but, but it isn't my it isn't a question of his will. I know it's his will to heal me. Where it gets healed will be where, here or there.

Brian Smith  34:29  
Yeah, yeah. Well, so healing to you? What does that mean to you? Said, healing either on this side or the other side. So what does healing mean to you? I interviewed a doctor. We were talking he's a very spiritual person, but he's very he's in the medical field, so he's be very cautious about the way he talks. I know he talks about, talks about cures versus healing. I hear a few doctors are starting to make that distinction, right? Because sometimes we're cured. Sometimes, you know we're healed, but we may not get the cure. So what does that mean to you?

Wendy Slattery  35:04  
That's a very good question. Brian, thank you for asking it, because I've been I've thought about that in seven years. I would tell you that in the seven years prior to Christmas, when I got this new relapse, I would have said, I am healed. I can go about my day. I feel great. I am doing everything everybody else is doing with vigor and stamina. I'm doing okay. That is a healed woman. Then I go to my doctor on a monthly basis and that, Oh no, she's going to tell me something I don't want to hear. But I was healed. Now, I have to tell you, I'm in a new place. I have relapsed so clearly at this moment, I have disease that needs to be dealt with. Healing to me will be getting through that tunnel by June, whatever the 100 days it takes as alive and with vitality and in remission that will be healed to me, where I can go back. I can I can take on my grandkids. I can take on a new book. I can do the things I love to do now, the only thing I wish I was doing still, but I wish I was working in my field of infectious diseases, but it's been, it's been traded for writing instead. And I enjoy writing,

Brian Smith  36:37  
and let's talk about writing so because, as we said, you weren't a reader before you're really into the science and stuff. Why is it important for you to tell the story? What is it that? What do you get out of doing that? Ah,

Wendy Slattery  36:50  
good question. Okay. Well, the first thing I really wanted my grandkids to know who I was when I was a little, when I was born, at two, my grandmother had died, and this was so this would be 1950s now, when I'm in my 30s, I go home and I I want to know more about my my grandmother would tell me about her, and she wouldn't tell me a thing. Was she a woman looking for love? Was she looking for a career. Why did she marry my grandfather? I wanted to know everything about her, kind of like you're going to watch a movie. I mean, was there intrigue? Was there something I want to know about her and my mother and her two sisters couldn't tell me a thing frustrated me, so I decided that I was going to write this book for them, and I was going to put it in a movie, like way, story after story where they were in, I guess that's first person. Is that, right? Jenny, I'm writing in first person where I am the the protagonist, I guess. So I don't even know I wrote a book. I don't even know what these words mean. Okay, so you're doing great. Keep it up. Okay, so I'm the protagonist, and I take them down this journey of life. You know, my anger at God for not healing Gail, understanding how I change because of that and and who God is. Because I'd walk them through the miracles of getting into medical school, I got a call from my fellowship place. I didn't even apply, and they called me to come in there and be their fellow. I was supposed to be an infectious disease doctor. There's a destiny in life, and I wanted my grandkids to know the one I had and so but it turned out that I enjoyed the writing so much because I could find myself going into places that were imaginary. And, oh, you know, let's look at it from this perspective, and let's bring Bilbo Baggins in, you know, and make it exciting. And I'll tell you my first three readers were my first my my grandchildren, and they read that book cover to cover, and I know they liked it a lot.

Jenny Slattery  39:11  
On your your story, I'm sorry to cut you off, but the story that you, that you not only told, but lived, spans some very interesting time periods. I mean, growing up on a farm in the 50s is not something that they know about, and the stories that come out of there are charming and funny, but also like, whoa, wow, that's different. And then you lived through the 70s on a college campus, whoa. And then you entered the computer industry because they were hiring just any, anybody with a degree, even, even a woman with a home actor. And they hired, I mean, what a what a beautiful stroke of luck that was. But here you are. I mean, you, you were there when the computer industry was taking off. And what. Time, and then the next thing, and then medical school, and then that. And, I mean, it's, it's a really interesting sequence of events. So the fact that you lived interestingly, I think, helped so

Wendy Slattery  40:11  
well done. Wendy,

Brian Smith  40:13  
I want to go back to something you said the very beginning about your sister, your artistic sister, and asking God to heal her. And it's really, this is just what's going on my life right now. Autism keeps coming up for some reason. For me, I've interviewed three people who who were dealing with autistic children. One was a teacher, and she was a non verbal boy named Asher, who she he, she grew up. He, she met him in first grade. He's like 30 now. She's written a book with him. He communicates to her telepathically. And interview two mothers of autistic children, and they, one of the one of the children has passed now, but they, they're mediums. They speak to people and spirit both, both boys do. And then I found this recently. There's a podcast called The telepathy tapes, and if you guys have heard about it, it's blowing up like crazy. These autistic children communicate with each other, non verbally, with their parents, again, some of them speaking to people across the veil, etc. And then the last thing I'll say, and I'll let you speak. But there, I just saw somebody the other day, and he was doing a video. He said, I don't have autism. It's not a disease that's something to be cured. I am autistic, and I thought that was really so when you were talking about your sister, I love that message that you got about her being perfect the way that she was made. So I'm just curious what your reflections would be on that.

Wendy Slattery  41:40  
Well, I guess I haven't experienced any telepathy or anything like that. My sister, you know, she, too, was grown up on the farm and a second class citizen, and even more so, as autistic. So she was really on the bottom of the list as far as important people, and thank goodness they they celebrate different today, and I'm very thankful for that, because Gail was a generation off in that I I know that the words I heard were from God himself, because he was the one I was addressing my my anger at, but I don't know is that telepathy, but I heard, I call it action of what I call it Brian. I call it the Eternity, Eternity network. That's what I call it. It's, it's when you've got communication with God, your father, and I knew, how can I all of a sudden, I change? I moment. It was a change, instant change, because I heard his voice. She was perfect, right? And she's going to help you become who I want you to be. Yeah, those were the only words I heard.

Brian Smith  43:05  
And what ways did she help you? That's a good question,

Wendy Slattery  43:08  
because it took me generation, a generation, to know that when I got sick the first time seven years ago, in that seven year journey that I've just come through, there was a park right by my house, and I would go there to try to pray to God, you know, you know, to help me understand why you took away my job, take tell me why you've given me this terminal illness. And then one moment when I was on the bench with the Lord, because I'd scoot over, and I'd imagine the Lord was right there beside me, and I would say, one morning, I asked the Lord, did I learn the things I was supposed to learn? I mean, my life is coming to an end. I can see the I'm on the back nine of my golf game here, okay? And I can see that there's not a lot of time left, and I'm asking the Lord, did I accomplish? Did Gail do what she was supposed to do in helping me become the person you wanted me to be? And I never got an answer, but I think he did. I think I she did. I mean, I think she did accomplish that goal. And you know what I was, I always hoped more for my sister, Gail, that that she'd have a life like I had, you know, you know, job and all these things. But, you know, as we look back now, Gail's had a fabulous life. She volunteers in Minnesota for whatever she feels like volunteering for. She's a spokesperson at the state capitol for the handicap. She's done more in her life than I know a lot of people. People that have more mental faculties have accomplished in their life, and she was my hero.

Brian Smith  45:07  
Yeah, awesome, yeah. May

Jenny Slattery  45:10  
I add to that? Because I watched you over the years. I I remember we were at the Minnesota State Fair one day, and I was probably 14 at the time, and there was a really big line to get into, not to get into, but it was a food vendor of some kind, maybe lemonade, and it was 103 degrees, whatever it was, it was in high demand. And so there's not a line, but like a crowd of people trying to make three lines, and there was a gentleman ahead of us who, I believe he was in a wheelchair, and so he was lower, and he had a harder time, like basically saying, I'm next in line just because of the height difference to the counter. And the there was some, there's somebody, a woman, cut in front of him, because everybody, you know, that feeling, everybody's tense, you can, like, sense it on everybody else when we all want, you know, we all gotta get to that counter and order the lemonade before it's gone. And she cut in front of him, and I saw my mom prickle like an instant porcupine, like, Oh no, no, no, no, no, no. You don't get to do that. And she, like, went up six people, or however many people were between us. And she was like, Excuse me, this gentleman was first and super loud, super obvious, but she advocated for the guy that got overlooked and could have easily gotten hidden in the crowd. And she carried that with her into her medical career, and as an infectious disease doctor, I mean, we'd get the stories of the diseases she'd seen yet around the dinner table, which was really entertaining. But in infectious disease, you sometimes end up with patients that other people don't want necessarily to see or work with, or they're difficult cases, or they're hard diseases to cure, and with that comes a lot of emotional baggage in the patient, a lot of doctors, you know, they've, they've pursued their careers, they went to college, and then they went to medical school, and they have an agenda, and they've got their their career, and it's all in, you know, their Excel spreadsheet at home, and they don't have time for this. And my mom comes at it from a very different perspective. And I mean, that's not all medicine and not not all of your colleagues, but, but she truly approached medicine with an eye out for the gales of the world, and her patients loved her. The notes that would come to our house from patients that other doctors hadn't maybe wanted and they had ended up in my mom's office. She loved them, and she saw them, and she absolutely gave them every bit of dignity that they deserved as a human being, created by the same Creator who created Gail perfectly, and she afforded them every bit of attention and time, and she looked out for them in a way that I think it would have been very easy for for those of us who didn't have a Gail in our lives to overlook without even realizing it. So that would be, I think, my observation.

Brian Smith  48:05  
Thank you. Daniel, yeah, thanks. Thanks for that. So when you mentioned earlier that you you grew up in kind of a fundamentalist background, you were given this, this image of God. How do you view God now?

Wendy Slattery  48:17  
Oh, okay, that's a good question. Well, when I was little, I was just mesmerized by the, you know, is he there or not? Or, why do we just all go to church and have these rules? I just didn't know. But I, but today, I would have to say that I have a personal relationship with my Lord and Savior. I know, I know him. I've heard his voice. That's the eater net that I tell you about. And you know when you know, you know when you know you've heard something, you just know it, and it can propel you here or there. It's the love, the love that that He has for us, for which we can share with someone else and and that was Thank you, Jenny. That was my love for my patients. I loved them, yeah, particularly the ones that were down and out. Yeah. Some of them were Yeah, but that is, that's the life I have today. Do I have those rules, those that Lutheran background still do i Well, yes, yes, I do. Do I go to Lutheran Church? No, I don't. It's I would have to say that I'm not religious. Even Jesus didn't like the religion of the day. So I would say I'm not religious, but I do have a spiritual life, a very strong one. It's got me through. It's got me through these seven years very nicely. And I still think I'm going to get my 20 that He promised me. That's my. God in heaven. Yeah, and I, and I'll have to say that all things work to the best, to those who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose. And it all worked out, and it still will. And even though I've got this thing looming in my direct future, here I will, I'll get through the car T therapy, but by the grace of God, or I'll be in heaven celebrating it. Was someone I used to know healed either way, either way, exactly,

Brian Smith  50:38  
yeah, well, um, I'm glad you got that, that promise of this 20 years. That's great. And no, I wish you the best with that. And the No, it's interesting, because we're never promised that the road will be easy, right? No, so that's one of the things that we are we are not promised in this life. And we all would like to be able to say, Okay, I went, I've gone through this. Isn't that enough? And wow, you reminded me I was interviewing a woman. She's She was born a thalidomide baby, which probably, you may know what that is. People that are younger may not in 60s. It was a drug that someone would took where they were pregnant. And so she ended up missing fingers in her hand, but it's a long, long story, but she went through everything. She lost her mother, she lost her son, she lost her husband, she became a dentist, and then she lost her career. But when I interviewed her, she was just like one of the most joyous people I'd ever met. You know, she was like, looking forward to spending time with her grandchildren and her daughters, and you know, she was looking to all the things that she had, right? And so once we have this perspective of, you know, look at what we have rather than what we don't have, we can endure pretty much anything

Wendy Slattery  51:53  
very true, very, very true. So, true, yeah, and that's a kind of a message I wanted to send to my grandchildren in that book. You know that it isn't an easy life for most, for anybody. We all have our setbacks, yeah, and it's, you know, it's okay. You kind of have to learn how to get through those setbacks.

Brian Smith  52:21  
Yeah, I honestly think the setbacks are universal. You know, it's funny, because we look at people from the outside and say, someone saw you at the grocery store this afternoon, they would imagine, no one's going to imagine that you've got this diagnosis. So you've gone, you know, you've had these issues. We we look at other people, we project, oh, they have a perfect life, and we all think, I'm the only one going through obstacles. So it's really that's what I love about, like books like yours, and sharing these stories with people, because it makes us feel not as alone, and we understand that, you know, God, source universe, whatever you want to call it, does have a plan for us, but it doesn't mean that it's all going to be sunshine and roses, because that plan could include some, some difficult times.

Wendy Slattery  53:05  
Well, true. I, I, like I said earlier, when I got my diagnosis seven years ago, I couldn't understand it, right? I honestly thought, God, I was mad at me or or maybe, why would? Why was this happening to me, and how could it happen to me? Yeah, I was doing everything right. I mean, I was a good person, and I was doing these things right. And,

Brian Smith  53:32  
yeah, and it's really interesting that you had that reaction. I appreciate your frankness there your honesty, because some people might say, well, you're an infectious disease, doctor, you're watching people suffer all the time and and we don't think they did something wrong, right? We don't. We don't look at them and say, You must have done something wrong. But that's, that's the thing we say to ourselves, because we have this kind of unwritten pact with God that, like, if I just do the right things, then nothing bad will happen to me, right?

Wendy Slattery  53:59  
Yes, I don't know where I got that thought, but I had it. I know. I don't know where it came from, maybe from the Lutheran church

Brian Smith  54:10  
Sunday school. It's a I called, I called the Santa Claus God. We're taught this God's up in heaven, yeah, if you do good things, then God will give you good stuff. And if you do bad things. God will give you bad stuff. It's the Santa Claus. God,

Wendy Slattery  54:23  
you deserved it, right? Yeah, yeah. They didn't really go into the book of

Jenny Slattery  54:26  
Job. And in Sunday school, they

Brian Smith  54:28  
don't, they don't talk about, yeah, they don't talk about the book of Job at all. And it's really interesting, because Job's the people around, the characters around you. Oh, job, you must you did something wrong. Job, obviously, just, and Job's like, No, I'm telling you that. Yes,

Jenny Slattery  54:41  
exactly. Oh, I love how that's like, placed right in the middle of the book, like it breaks every paradigm we could possibly bring ourselves. I love that. Oh, that is such a fabulous point. Brian, thank you. Yeah. So

Brian Smith  54:54  
I Wendy, we're running short of time. So I want to say I. Thank you so much for being here today, and you as well for for chipping in when you remind people of the name of your book. Yes, and I know you've got a mini documentary also,

Wendy Slattery  55:11  
yeah, the edge of the unseen world, a doctor's journey from the imaginary to the impossible. And that's the book. It's on Amazon. It's on Barnes and Noble other places. And my website is Wendy slattery.com W, E, N, D, y, s, L, A, T, T, the same.com and I do have a documentary on there, done by

Jenny Slattery  55:39  
Jenny help me. He's an Emmy Award winning storyteller. He's very good, yeah,

Wendy Slattery  55:44  
and he told my story, yeah, one afternoon, and that's on my website. Awesome, beautiful.

Brian Smith  55:51  
Well, again, thanks for being here. I know you're in beautiful Arizona. We're recording this in January. I'm in Ohio, jealous. So enjoy your time there. And Jenny, thanks for being here with us today. You guys have a great rest of your afternoon. Thank

Wendy Slattery  56:06  
you, Brian, for the honor to be here. Thank you very much. Thank you, and thank you for the work that you're doing. Keep it up. Thank you. Thanks. You.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai